The sound of one man voting

SHERWOOD KIRALY

I’m not there yet, but by Tuesday I’ll have all my issues straight.

I’ve got my pamphlet and I’m wading through -- although 180 pages of

propositions, many of them followed by a rebuttal to the effect that

“this proposition says the exact opposite of what it says it’s

saying,” can get you staring out the window.

But voting, like baseball, is an American tradition that’s coming

back big, and I’ll be out there Tuesday, punching away at the new

keyboard. It’s a great opportunity, and flattering, too. The country

wants my opinion on who should be president and the state wants my

opinion on stem cell research, tribal gaming, DNA sample collection,

the three-strikes law and employee health care.

There’s also a local election, which to judge from my mailbox is

grimmer and more intense than any of that national and state stuff.

So all in all I’ve got a lot of people and proposals to straighten

out. I’ll do it; in fact I’ll enjoy it.

I haven’t always been such an active participant. When I was 22 I

voted, and my guy lost. The system clearly didn’t work. For several

years thereafter I was pleased to complain about the mediocrity of

the candidates and lament the passing of the godlike statesmen I’d

read about in school.

Then one year a TV personality was being spoken of as a

presidential candidate and it occurred to me that someday I might

want to vote against someone, so I re-registered.

(I’ve been called for jury duty more or less constantly ever

since, but that isn’t so bad. One side or the other always excuses

me; I don’t know why. I just tell them I write comic novels and I’m

out of there.)

Nowadays, of course, everybody’s registering. Our two favorite

excuses for not voting (“My vote doesn’t matter” and “There’s no

difference between the candidates”) have gotten shaky, so there’s

sure to be a good turnout on Tuesday.

Over the last four years, voter attitude has changed from “Why

bother?” to “Try and stop me.” This year I’m not only ready for the

election, I’m ready for the lawsuits after the election.

Errors and abuses on election day are always possible and no doubt

it’s best to be vigilant. In Chicago, my native town, the mayor’s

machine was once notorious for bringing in the graveyard vote.

But here we are, having come through over 200 years of exclusion,

coercion, fraud and fluke, about to exercise the franchise again, and

looking forward to it. People say the country’s badly divided now,

but on the other hand there’s always something dicey about a nation

where the president gets voted in unanimously.

So get out there and vote your conscience. Have fun with it. See

you at the polls. And see you in court.