An ocean of talent utterly wasted in dull movie

JOHN DEPKO

“Ocean’s Twelve” is guaranteed to be nominated for nothing at Oscar

time, unless “Most Disappointing Big Budget Movie of the Year”

becomes a new category. Never has so much A-list talent been put to

so little use.

It’s hard to imagine that George Clooney, Brad Pitt, Matt Damon,

Julia Roberts, Bruce Willis and Catherine Zeta-Jones could all be

found sleepwalking through the same scenes. But there they are:

beautiful, bored and devoid of any interest in the work at hand.

The word in Hollywood is that the whole production was a European

summer vacation and tax write-off for the stars involved. The final

product fully justifies this rumor.

A thriller without thrills, a crime caper without suspense,

“Ocean’s Twelve” is vapid moviemaking at its very worst. It’s

pointless and lifeless at every turn. You would have to rent

“Cannonball Run” from more than 20 years ago to find a similar piece

of movie trash with major stars just goofing off, having fun and

pretending to act in a real movie.

The overpaid actors bring self-indulgence to a new level. The

disjointed screenplay is not worth describing. This film is lame in

every way imaginable.

Renowned director Steven Soderbergh embarrasses himself with his

most uninspiring effort to date.

Full of contrived banter and silly situations, this film is dead

on arrival.

Save your money. It’s not even worth renting.

* JOHN DEPKO is a Costa Mesa resident and a senior investigator

for the Orange County public defender’s office.