Enjoying moments of idleness

If you can spend a perfectly useless afternoon in a perfectly useless manner, you have learned how to live.

-- Lin Yutang

The head cold that has tethered me somewhat for the past week had finally abated. I was tired of the short walks on the hill of my neighborhood and longed for the sand beneath my feet. Even low tide was a high one, and I found myself climbing up and down stairs to and from the stretch of beach I chose to walk. It was an exhilarating start to an otherwise contemplative morning.

As I walked, my mind kept turning to thoughts of busy-ness and boredom. Somewhere buried in the thoughts was a question. A recent lunch with friends had brought up this subject, and I found I could not quite shake it from my thoughts.

Lynn, who had recently quit a job, was asked by a now-former co-worker, “Aren’t you bored?”

“Bored?” When Lynn said this, Catharine and I were both shocked. How could anyone freed from a job that felt just like that -- a job -- be bored with the time and space granted in freedom from that job?

Perhaps the issue really harks back to the quote from Lin Yutang above -- what is “useless,” and who gets to decide? It is probably a matter of perception in the end, as so many things are. The woman who asked the question of Lynn would likely be bored in Lynn’s freedom. This woman might find kayaking or walking along the shoreline or staring at the horizon listening to the birds boring.

On the other hand, I think that most of my friends would agree that the freedom to be -- to be in awareness and available to the moment unhampered by a need to be busy and on task -- is a wonderful gift. And so, when I walked along the sandy stretch of beach today, dodging the tides nipping at my feet, I was grateful for this freedom -- for the time and the space.

When I encountered Jody Hoy, who had recently retired from teaching, we spoke of retirement and all the possibilities now open to her. We also spoke of the gratitude we each felt to be “useless” and to simply walk this stretch of beach each morning. The gratitude stretched beyond those moments to all of life’s blessings -- so easy to forget in the hectic moments of busy-ness. Walking on, I though how important it is to cherish our imperfect lives in all of their moments.

Reinvigorated by Jody’s smile and soft-voiced clarity, I looked down the beach to where I could see another morning friend, Frank Jarvis. There he sat on distant Main Beach with newspaper in hand and coffee nearby. I thought how like a beacon he seemed there -- constant and sure each day.

When I reached the place where Frank sat, I stopped and sat down to chat. The tasks for the day were all still there, but they were forgotten for the moment as I merely enjoyed good conversation with this friend for a bit of time. A lone seagull came over and scolded us for some infraction, dolphins foraged near shore, other friends passed by with a wave. What a day!

Leaving Frank to finish his reading and with a reminder to say hello to Karen for me, I moved off the beach to the boardwalk, where I got a good hug from George Davis of the beaming Irish smile. I was again reminded in this encounter to be grateful for each new day.

Checking the time as I crossed Coast Highway, I noted that a full two hours had passed for my 45-minute walk. I had not been bored for a minute of that time. I’d even say it was a perfectly useless morning thus far, spent in a perfectly useless manner that felt like the perfect answer to a still unasked question. I smiled at the pleasure of it all as I moved off to the busy-ness part.

* Cherril Doty is a creative life coach and artist, exploring the mysteries of life as they come. You can reach her by e-mail at cherril@cherrildoty.com or by calling (949) 251-3883.

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