THE MORAL OF THE STORY:Slow down and savor the good times

“For fast-acting relief, try slowing down.”

Lily Tomlin

“It was so great to get away with the family. There is nothing quite like a change of pace and place,” my friend said to me after she returned home from a week away.

We talked about their trip to the Pacific Northwest, how green the trees were, how blue the sky was and how scenic everything seemed to her.

She said everybody in her family got along better than she remembered them doing in a long while. She said she felt more connected to God and to her family.

She used the words “peaceful” and “relaxing” repeatedly in a short amount of time. I pointed that out to her and said that maybe they could try to find ways to re-create some of that peaceful, connected feeling at home, too.

I also told her that she made me think of another friend who told me her discovery after her own family vacation to Hawaii several years ago.

I explained that my friend and her family had wanted to go to Hawaii for years, and when they were finally able to go, my friend did a lot of work ahead of time researching and planning all the best activities she could think of.

She’d scheduled hikes, bike rides, sailing, surfing lessons, fishing, and, of course, plenty of beach time with swimming and snorkeling.

During the trip, everybody enjoyed all of the activities she had planned. She was looking forward to compliments from her children when she asked them what their favorite thing was about their trip. Her children looked at each other, smiled, and one of them said, “Mom, we talked about it, and it was all great, but if you really want to know, our favorite thing was that never once did you say, “Hurry up.”

I said that my friend had been both happy and saddened by her children’s answer; happy that they liked everything, but sad that she hadn’t even realized how often she hurried her children to too many activities.

On their first night home from Hawaii, they had a family pow-wow and they agreed that they were all overscheduled. They eliminated some activities, added more family dinners together and were enjoying each other more.

My friend said she had already been trying to do the same thing since returning from the Pacific Northwest, and she was pleased at how much her family enjoyed dinners together.

“Somehow, we’d gotten away from that because we had such busy schedules, but we liked eating together on our trip, and we’re trying that more at home,” she said. “Even when the dinners are quick, we all seem to enjoy reconnecting.”

She repeated her sentiment about how much she felt connected to God and to her family, and I added that God isn’t the author of speed, but of serenity.

We can’t always do much to change the place, but there are often things that we can do to change our pace.

And you can quote me on that.