REEL CRITICS DOUBLE TAKE:’Black’ is bleak; I want my money back

We are being played for suckers. “The Black Dahlia” is a bad B-movie, and not even in a good way.

You would think, based on the title and the ads, that this movie would be about the infamous and stillunsolved murder of Elizabeth Short, whose grotesquely mutilated body was found in Los Angeles in 1947. Adapted from a novel by James Ellroy (“L.A. Confidential”) and directed by Brian De Palma (“Scarface”), it seemed like a winning combination.

It has the look of expensive film noir with great sets, costumes, and some terrific camera tricks. But it’s overshadowed by dull and contrived dialogue, and a plot as disjointed and lifeless as that poor dead woman.

Aaron Eckhart and Josh Hartnett are two cops, Lee and Bucky, who did some boxing on the side and were billed as “Fire and Ice,” a combination that should make steam but only creates fog.

They wind up on the Black Dahlia murder case since they were just a block away when the body was found. Before that, they were chasing and killing bad guys, but we don’t understand who or why.

Everything’s a muddle, and much of this can be attributed to the acting. Hartnett is pretty but only has one facial expression: blank. Eckhart, so great in “Thank You for Smoking,” is over the top even before his character starts doing drugs. Scarlett Johansson, as the voluptuous sweater girl loved by both men, tries to smolder, but can only muster some smoke from her cigarette holder.

Hilary Swank has a little fun as a bisexual heiress and possible suspect. She dresses the part of the classic femme fatale, but her main function is to introduce her insanely dysfunctional family. De Palma’s taste for the gothic and grotesque really comes to the forefront here, and Fiona Shaw, as Swank’s Mommie Dearest, is both hilarious and creepy in her scenes.

Finally, a (dim) light bulb goes off in Hartnett’s head and the mystery is revealed. There was a crime, but we were the ones being punished.

More style than substance, but likable

James Elroy was the writer of “L.A. Confidential” and Brian De Palma the director of “Carlito’s Way” and “Scarface.” Together, they team up in “The Black Dahlia” to create another complex crime thriller.

The producers brought A-list actors and production values to the effort to successfully recreate the sordid atmosphere of back-alley Los Angeles in the 1940s

The tale is built around the infamous unsolved murder of Elizabeth Short. She was a would-be actress hanging onto the dark fringes of Hollywood in 1947, hoping for a big break that never came.

We see her only in flashback, played with sultry sadness by Canadian actress Mia Kershner. But her gruesome murder is just the background story of “The Black Dahlia.”

The screenplay really centers on the personal lives of two LAPD detectives and the dangerous women who complicate their situation.

Hillary Swank and Scarlett Johansson are outstanding as the femme fatales who steam up the screen every time they appear.

Aaron Eckhart is competent as the hot-tempered cop who can barely control himself. But the casting of young Josh Hartnett as his partner borders on the ludicrous. It’s impossible to imagine this quiet, baby-faced actor as a grizzled homicide detective in any era.

Still, there’s a lot to like in this film, which may garner some Oscar nominations for acting or cinematography. But in the end, there’s a lot more style than substance, with a contrived ending that rings hollow.