IN THEORY:Making Jesus a man’s man

Recent statistics show that more women than men attend church services, prompting many religious leaders to promote Jesus as a tougher, more masculine figure. The numbers indicate that more than 60% of adults at typical worship services are women. That amounts to 13 million more women than men at church on Sunday, according to David Murrow, author of “Why Men Hate Going to Church.” The Barns Group, a Christian polling firm, concluded that women are also more likely to go to Sunday school, read the Bible and regularly pray. Have you experienced this trend among your flock, and would you view this approach as an effective one to solve the problem?

Given that women have “invaded” the sacrosanct male clubs known as houses of worship, sparking an exodus rivaling that of the Jews from Egypt, preachers are jettisoning the gentle Jesus in favor of a Jesus whose pecs are rippled, visage is chiseled, and abs are washboard flat — a high-fiving, drum-beating, promise-keeping Jesus. A testosterone-deprived Jesus will not play in what should be restored as a bastion of muscularity! Alpha-males will be attracted by a Jesus brimming with machismo. Give them the brawny Jesus who drove out the money changers, not the Jesus who spouted that “blessed be the meek” pap. Give them that carpenter who wields hammer and tong as the sparks fly, not that caterer serving loaves and fishes to wedding guests. Revive the Teddy Roosevelt era “manly redeemer.”

The shortest verse in the New Testament is “Jesus wept.” Obviously, men know this was purposeful — we should not make too much of Jesus crying! Men want girded loins, not overflowing eyes.

Jesus is not only drawn as the archetype of any given culture, he has metamorphosed from one type to another, owing to the fixations of the times. One commentator lists the “Social Gospel Protestant Jesus,” the “Marxist preaching the Sermon on the Barricades to the oppressed proletariat,” the “Aryan eager to condemn Judaism,” the “Flower-Child” in “Godspell,” the “Rock God” in “Jesus Christ Superstar.” Jesus has been identified as a post-modernist, a feminist, a New Age pantheist, a Hindu, a Buddhist, a marketing genius, and a chief executive officer. “Of the making of ‘real’ Jesuses there is no end. Any ‘real’ Jesus, like all the previous ‘real’ Jesuses, tells us more about our current cultural quirks and obsessions than it does about anything substantial in the historical record.”

Some clergy appropriate the “nice-guy” Jesus, while others preach the “lake of burning fire” Jesus; some proclaim the Jesus who comes “not to bring peace but a sword,” while others offer up a Jesus who is a possibility thinker, healer of our inner child, and guarantor of untold wealth. From the secularized Jesus of the Deists to Langston Hughes’ Black Jesus, Jesus is nothing if not malleable.

Every age creates Jesus in its own image and finds the Jesus it needs. As one author put it, “The Biblical text may be the wine skin, but each generation fills it with new wine made from grapes in its own local vineyard.” Speaking of grapes, obviously the Jesus who will win back men to the churches is the one who spends his time loosing fateful lightning and trampling out the vintage where the grapes of wrath are stored.

So, to draw males to the pews, bring on a Jesus with the he-man appeal of Gary Cooper and Victor Mature, not an introspective, vulnerable Jesus, in the mold of Montgomery Clift and Leslie Howard.

What will women think of this aggressively masculine Jesus? Frankly, my dear, we don’t give a damn! After all, we are manly men, not girlie girls!

RABBI MARK S. MILLER

Temple Bat Yahm

Newport Beach

Like so many of these issues, there must be a middle ground. I don’t believe in Brad Stine’s idea that cussing makes a man a more masculine Christ follower, but I do believe that men are not attracted to sitting around in a study early on a Saturday morning, singing and sharing their emotions and failures.

At the Beacon, we are trying to provide men the opportunity to scuba dive, surf, camp out and form meaningful relationships with other men so they don’t need to “Lone Ranger” life. (By the way, why was he called the Lone Ranger if Tonto was always there to save him?)

I just had a discussion today with our staff about the need for men to teach children in our Bible hour for kids. Kids need to see that the faith is not just for women but for men as well. Boys need to learn Bible stories from masculine and feminine perspectives. For example, one curriculum editor said that their curriculum about the Good Samaritan for children had the teachers asking the children to describe what color the story made them feel? Men don’t “feel” colors. Boys tune out of lessons like that. Teaching the story as merely about being compassionate or helping others is not very attractive. In addition to hearing about compassion, boys need to hear about standing up for justice and integrity. The same story needs to be told from a more complete perspective.

We are also learning from our Jewish friends and forefathers who “mitzvah” their children as a rite of passage. We are developing ongoing mentoring that peaks in a welcoming to adulthood and responsibility. Our sons need to know that following Jesus has everything to do with who they are sexually and not just who they are spiritually.

Though we need to see Jesus as compassionate and merciful, to relegate him to those limited traits will also limit men from following him. For too long, the Church has been dominated by a feminine Jesus and led by men wearing dress-like robes and who live asexual lives. That is far from attractive as a model for most men.

RIC OLSEN

Lead Pastor

The Beacon

Anaheim

The priest of the first parish I served at, in Medfield, Mass., had played intercollegiate football and was much admired by both males and females in that congregation for being “a man’s man.” Whenever I portray Jesus’ masculinity with contemporary athletic metaphors (God’s quarterback or designated hitter, or grace as a slam dunk), I hear about my being a sports nut. Go figure!

Leaders in this Episcopal parish church intentionally include men and women equally. There are boys and girls in our church school classes and youth groups. Similar gender equality is real at our Sunday worship services, I think, although I don’t take roll. Our Tuesday morning worship attracts mostly men while our Thursday noon worship draws mostly women; this seems to me due to camaraderie and timing, not content or virility. We have some ministries directed by and for women (Women’s Discovery, WomanSpirit) and others primarily for men (Readers and Seekers); to the best of my knowledge they watch neither chick flicks nor macho movies, but they do read books like Virginia Ramey Mollenkott’s “The Divine Feminine: The Biblical Imagery of God as Female” and Sam Keen’s “Fire in the Belly: On Being a Man.” My associate and assistant, the Rev’d Martha Susan Korienek, a deacon soon to be a priest, is a wonderful young woman, an excellent balance to my gender, my age, and my sports nuttiness!

(THE VERY REV’D CANON)

PETER D. HAYNES

Saint Michael & All Angels

Episcopal Church

Corona del Mar

The feminization of the church has a long history. In my own experience it was usually my mother who took four children to Mass and catechism while Dad stayed home to do yardwork. Going to church on Sunday was certainly family time minus Dad, and Mom has a lot of stories of the hours spent dressing us, feeding us, and refereeing squabbles just to get the crew in the car. Once in the pews, it was a long hour trying to listen, be still and keep up with all the rituals, with Mom monitoring the whole ordeal.

It is an interesting exercise to discuss why Christian men don’t attend church or participate in church activities and prayer in higher numbers. When a band at a revival meeting, mentioned in a recent Los Angeles Times article, opens with “Forget the yin and the yang; I’ll take the boom and the bang,” I think they got it wrong. What some Christian men are saying is that there is too much yin, they want more yang — and they can’t forget it! They don’t feel they can be themselves and are not attracted to the Christian ideal that is being presented.

At our Zen Center we have the opposite problem. Three-quarters of our participants are male. It is important for us to discuss why and to address the issue. Zen comes out of a martial and warrior tradition so that may be a turn-off for some women. Working hard at a spiritual path may not be appealing for those who are looking for a softer approach. And certainly working closely with a teacher can be brutal and demands toughness and resiliency.

To paraphrase Rick Warren — a church will be successful if it responds to the needs of its congregants. But what are the deepest needs? Certainly people will not participate if they don’t feel minimally comfortable. But what brings people to a spiritual path is a call to love God and to serve the world. In Buddhism the name for God is “Tathagata,” translated as “Thus Come,” or “thusness,” or this very moment. To love is to be awake to this very life as I am living it. To serve means to help others to wake up and to relieve suffering in the world.

I’m not sure loud music, profanity and careless dress are necessarily the way to extend hospitality in the Church. But there are more skillful forms than off-putting rituals, girlie vestments, and phony appeals to be nice. Each congregation should discuss and study the issues and be creative in making an atmosphere where men, women and families can practice their faith comfortably together.

REV. CAROL AGUILAR

Zen Center of Orange County

Costa Mesa

Women, by nature, tend to be more emotional than men and are more sensitive to the plight of others. For the raising of children, women have to emphasize the care and protection of others. Thus, it is natural that many women are more concerned with fulfilling emotional needs than they are in knowing factual truths. Men, to fulfill their purpose in life, have to be more practical and like to accomplish their goals by any means possible, including force when necessary. Testosterone, apparently, has proven necessary for survival.

Men feel uncomfortable in church because there is a large element of fantasy and a general lack of evidence in support of much of what they are supposed to believe and accept as true in order to be a proper member of most religious organizations. They may outwardly accept everything that their religion tells them to believe, and may even get belligerent (as in beating up gays) in support of some beliefs of their chosen (or assigned — as by their parents) religion. But there has to be some lingering doubt about some of the stories, the presumed miracles, and the justification for the rules of their religion.

Women’s nature makes them want the great emotional package and feeling of security that can come to one who has dropped the idea of harboring any doubts in their mind about their religion and have decided to be a true believer, regardless of any evidence to the contrary.

Thus, it seems natural that more women than men go to church. The other side of that coin, which sort of proves the point, is that at the local American Humanist meetings here in Orange County, the men outnumber the women. The subjects for discussion usually involve science, philosophy and practical questions about life here on earth and not of any presumed afterlife. No one is supposed to simply believe something because it is part of a tradition or is based on some gripping emotional story (like the flood story in the Bible that was borrowed from the much earlier epic of Gilgamesh), or is simply repeated over and over until it is accepted as fact.

There is reason to believe that the simple and judicial application of the Golden Rule alone could accomplish more good worldwide than abiding by all the rules of the various religions, which actually would end up in endless contradictions and chaos.

JERRY PARKS

Member

Humanist Assn.

of Orange County

I have been the rabbi of Temple Isaiah in Newport Beach since the summer of 1990. The data of Jewish worship in my congregation shows the following facts.

Jews desire a strong family life and attend our synagogue primarily as families (not on the basis as males or females).

Jewish parents still seem to hover over their children and give them shorter rein to miss Shabbat attendance. Many children are bribed or forced to attend temple on a weekly basis as a family with their parents.

Because Jewish services primarily are on Friday nights, we compete against other communal and social events. Therefore, our own fantastic programs and special events bring out more people and make Shabbat service more meaningful and enjoyable.

Since most Jews do not seem obligated to attend Friday night service, I, as a rabbi, have to encourage and invite people to come on an individual basis. Here at Temple Isaiah, we spend a lot of time and money to nurture and encourage people of all ages and genders to encourage and attend our service. We have an even number of males and females at our service.

We offer a free religious school and free B’nai mitzvah training as part of our Temple membership.

We have a fantastic cantor, Cantor Svetlana, who does cantorial at all of our Friday night services, appealing to both young and old, male and female.

Two wills make a group — the will to perpetuate Judaism beyond your lifetime, and the will to see the temple thrive and flourish beyond your own years passed down directly to your children. This usually occurs at lifecycle milestone events.

Jews do not separate themselves from the Jewish community. They, regardless of gender, support the temple and Israel.

Most Jews do three things annually, regardless of gender. They light Hanukkah candles, attend synagogue on the High Holy days, and go to a Passover Seder. The macho image of a religious male or the savvy spirituality of a beautiful and sensitive female have little or no effect on Shabbat worship. The image of the Biblical King David, or the beauty of Queen Esther are not a drawing card for most and many Jews to come to the temple.

RABBI MARC S. RUBENSTEIN

Temple Isaiah

Newport Beach