REEL CRITICS:Gory comic book on screen

If you saw the trailer for “300” you know exactly what you are going to see. It’s faithfully based on Frank Miller’s graphic novel of the heroic stand of 300 Spartans against the mighty army of ancient Persia. The cinematography is gorgeous and the special effects are astounding. But in the end, this film is all about the stylized blood and guts splattered across the screen without mercy.

There’s a smattering of political intrigue, treachery and sexy interludes. But really, folks, it’s all about the blood. Men are sliced, diced and decapitated by the hundreds. Fast-motion killings are constantly interspersed with slow-motion images of the dead guy’s blood hanging in space using the CGI techniques that were made so familiar in the “The Matrix.”

Platitudes and lame dialogue fill the empty spaces. Teenagers addicted to video games or paintball adventures may find that “300” is their hot new R-rated entertainment. But for anyone old enough to pay a mortgage, it’s full of grotesque violence masquerading as a cinematic comic book.

JOHN DEPKO is a Costa Mesa resident and a senior investigator for the Orange County public defender’s office.

Classic-style monster movie surprises

In “The Host,” an arrogant U.S. Army doctor orders his Korean assistant to dump hundreds of bottles of formaldehyde down the drain because they “are dusty.”

So what if it all goes into Seoul’s Han River? So what if, years later, it produces an inconvenient truth in the form of a giant mutant fish lizard that comes bounding ashore, stomping and chomping everything in its path?

This old-fashioned monster movie was better than I expected with its contemporary jabs at military and government bureaucracy, dysfunctional families, and environmental blunders. It will have you jump in your seat as well as provide a few intentional giggles.

During his initial rampage, the Godzilla-meets-Alien creature sweeps up a young schoolgirl and plunges back into the river as her horrified father looks on.

The military announces the creature carries a deadly virus not unlike severe acute respiratory syndrome, or SARS, creating even more mass hysteria fueled by overzealous health officials rounding up potentially infected citizens.

Amazingly, more energy seems to go into doing live experiments on the alleged “hosts” of the virus than on capturing and killing the beast. It looks like only the initially victimized family is actively vested in killing the creature, brave yet ill-equipped as they may be.

“The Host” is a very cool popcorn flick. Hollywood will probably do a lame remake with big-budget effects.

SUSANNE PEREZ lives in Costa Mesa and is an executive assistant for a financial services company.