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IN THE PIPELINE:

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She looks reasonably relaxed and calm. She speaks in measured thoughtful sentences, pausing from time to time to make sure she finds just the right word. A couple of her adopted pups trot in, two tiny hardship cases named Carl and Chad (the latter, missing a leg — he was extra needy, and that’s why he’s here).

She smiles a bit nervously as she says she’ll be chaperoning her 15-year-old son’s date later that afternoon. Just another day for a mom who has just helped get her 29 kids ready for school.

Sharing a quiet moment with Ann Silcock is something to be valued and appreciated — she is a busy woman, after all. As you may be aware, Ann and her husband, Jim, have adopted 43 children over the last 10 years, focusing their life’s energies on building a family made up of kids that, as Ann puts it, “People just didn’t want. Kids who are disabled, abused… everything.” But what may be cumbersome disabilities to some parents become diamonds in the rough for the Silcocks — they’ve watched boys bloom into young men in their household over the years, thriving in an environment that’s nurturing, positive and productive.

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The room where we sit is quiet and calm. We’re in a house next door to their main residence; a place the Silcocks are adapting for their ever-growing brood. Next door, Ann’s Jim is helping get the last kids off to school (currently, 29 sons live at home, ranging in age from 4 to 16). This helps create some time for us to talk.

A stack of camp forms sits in front of Ann, and she’ll pore over these after I leave. She says a typical day starts by setting the breakfast table for 29 hungry mouths, followed by getting them off to school (28 will leave, one son is home schooled). At 2 p.m., the boys will start returning and by 3:30 p.m., everyone is back home — at which point things like homework and recreational activities commence. Sixteen workers help with the boys who have total health-care needs, and Ann and Jim use every free moment to forge special one-to-one relationships with each son, as well as providing a larger scale family concept for the boys.

The main thing I want to know about today is a new musical CD put out by the family. Called “Team Silcock,” it is the second effort by the family, and represents a therapeutic exercise in helping the kids think, dream and create. Several years ago, Ann met singer/songwriter Dave Nachmanoff after he had played with Al Stewart at the nearby Coach House in San Juan Capistrano. A friendship developed and soon, Ann had recruited Dave to bring his much-in-demand songwriting workshop right into the Silcock household.

Nachmanoff, a multi-talented writer/teacher/performer, was knocked out by the family. “Once I gained the confidence of the boys it became easier to get them to open up as we created songs about their lives. The workshops we did were cathartic, and the songs have a real power to them. I was also impressed by this amazing notion of service the Silcocks have taught their sons — they’re taught to help each other, to look out for each other — to care for each other.”

Nachmanoff’s deep connection with the kids resulted in “In The Family,” a 17-song CD featuring songs written by the Silcock family along with Nachmanoff. Now comes “Team Silcock,” 20 new songs again written by the Silcock/Nachmanoff team.

Ann says the project was a wonderful chance to give the kids a vehicle for expression, as well as a lesson in the creative process. The lyrics read like diaries in a sense… From the title track: “Lots of brothers, they come from far and wide, Russian and Romania and also Oceanside. Carolina all the way to Kazakhstan brought together by the grace of a woman called St. Ann.”

And from “Family Sharing:” “When you share you show respect. When you share, you’re not just a little speck and people respect you too. When you share.”

Plaintive and honest, the catchy, well-crafted songs (sung primarily by Nachmanoff with support vocals from the Silcock boys) are layered with lessons about the human experience. From “Enchantment Under The Sea:” “At camp last summer, there in the gym, my heart was pounding, it was sink or swim. I was afraid. To take a risk… but if I didn’t, what would I miss?”

A third CD is in the works, and Ann believes that with each new piece of work, their family’s complex network will become simpler and stronger; and new bonds will be forged by working together and singing together. I’ll write more about this remarkable family, but for now if you’d like more information visit www.allourboys.com. To learn more about David Nachmanoff, visit www.davenach.com.

This column marks the one-year anniversary (52 editions) of In The Pipeline. I won’t get sentimental after just one year, but I would like to thank all of you for the correspondence, feedback, good thoughts and critiques.


CHRIS EPTING is the author of 11 books. You can write him at chris@chrisepting.com.

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