SOUNDING OFF:

With the change to the Obama administration, it is starting to come out how extensive the warrantless surveillance of U.S. citizens had become. Lest the neighbors think they are safe, I thought I’d share how I made the Terrorist Suspect List. Last fall, I decided to skip the Internet and phone a real live Delta agent in Atlanta to book a flight:

I dialed an 800 number and the National Security Agency’s computer kicked in.

Agent: “How may I help you sir?”

Bob: “I’d like to use frequent-flier miles for a party of two from SNA to RSW the morning of Oct. 7, returning Dec. 7.”

Agent: “One moment please — I’m sorry sir, but that date is unavailable.”

Bob: “Well, can you try the days around the seventh?”

Agent: “I’m sorry sir, you must give me a specific date. The computer will not respond without a date.”

Bob: “OK, try Oct. 8.”

Agent: “One moment please — I’m sorry sir, but that date is unavailable.”

Silence

Bob: “Are you still there?”

Agent: “Yes, sir.”

Silence

Bob: “Well, try another day.”

Agent: “I’m sorry, sir, but you must give me a date. The computer will not respond without a date.”

Bob: “I can tell you’re having trouble with this concept. Are you an employee of Delta Airlines?”

Agent: “No, sir.”

Bob: “And you’re not in Atlanta, are you?”

Agent: “No, sir.”

Bob: “Do you mind if I ask where you are?”

Agent: “No, sir.”

Silence — pause.

Bob: “Well then, exactly where are you?”

Agent: “Mumbai.”

Bob: “Mumbai?”

Agent: “Mumbai.

Agent: “Yes, sir.”

Bob: “That’s not in the United States is it?

Agent: “No, sir.”

Bob: “I’m not familiar with Mumbai. Can you tell me where it is?”

Agent: “Yes, sir. Mumbai is in India. It used to be called Bombay.”

Having heard the word “bomb” in conjunction with air travel on an international phone call, the NSA computer automatically added the Schmidt household to the list of international terrorist suspects.

The latest news is it didn’t even have to be an international call. For the strict constructionists out there, I refer you to the 4th Amendment.

BOB SCHMIDT lives in Corona del Mar.