In Theory

The Dalai Lama told the Associated Press that he hadn’t heard of Tiger Woods. This admission from Tibet’s exiled spiritual leader came after the part-time Corona del Mar resident confessed on national television to having had extra-marital liaisons. Woods, whose Thai mother had previously exposed him to Buddhism, talked about how “Buddhism teaches that a craving for things outside ourselves causes an unhappy and pointless search for security. It teaches me to stop following every impulse and to learn restraint. Obviously I lost track of what I was taught.”

When told about this, the 14th Dalai Lama of Tibet seemed to embrace the idea that Woods seek the Middle Path by leaning on the precepts of his faith. “Whether you call it Buddhism or another religion, self-discipline, that’s important,” the AP quoted the spiritual leader as saying. “Self-discipline with awareness of consequences.”

Whether you follow Buddhism or another religion, do you agree with what Tiger Woods and the Dalai Lama both had to say about the importance of self-restraint and discipline?

Regardless of what Tiger Woods is doing — and what the Dalai Lama or Brit Hume have to say about it — what is important is how each of us can make good choices in our own lives. We are disillusioned when sports superstars, elected officials, spiritual leaders and trusted professionals do not live up to their own ideals or to their public image. But infidelity and addiction are widespread, and they touch many people very personally.

Each of us must take responsibility for developing our own spiritual and ethical fitness, just as we devote time and energy to physical fitness — and of course self-restraint and discipline are important.

People know from their experience that self-discipline and restraint will only take them so far. Will power or “white knuckling” eventually fails. Zen Buddhism underscores the futility of chopping down weeds if the roots remain. The roots are our ignorance, our confused desires or mistaken ideas and the weeds are harmful actions.

If we are honest with ourselves, we know that a life devoted to getting as much as I can for myself, at the expense of others, does not bring happiness. This innate wisdom creates guilt, uneasiness, anger and depression when we hurt others. We come home to ourselves in meditation, which offers liberation from cravings, negative feelings and impulses as we reconnect with our true selves.

The Rev. Deborah Barrett

Zen Center of Orange County

Costa Mesa

In the Book of Proverbs we read: “Rejoice in the wife of your youth....Why should you be smitten my son with a loose woman....? The iniquities of the wicked ensnare him, and he is caught in the toils of his sin. He dies for lack of discipline and because of his great folly he is lost.”

Woods’ profligacy contrasted with his professional discipline. How he kept a score card of his entanglements was a perverse accomplishment! He epitomizes the prayer of humorist Sam Levenson: “Lead us not into temptation; just tell us where it is and we’ll find it ourselves.”

There is nothing wrong with temptation. It shows whether we really are the people of God we think we are, or pretend to be. Temptation is a test. It is no sin to be tempted. The negative consequences arise when we yield to enticement, for temptation’s foothold quickly becomes a stranglehold. As the Talmud teaches: “At first sin is like a spider’s thread; in the end it is like a ship’s rope.”

The Book of Proverbs teaches: “One who can master his passions is greater than one who can conquer a city.” We might add: “One who can master his passions is greater than he who can conquer the 17th hole at St. Andrews in the British Open.”

Rabbi Mark S. Miller

Temple Bat Yahm

Newport Beach

First, we ought to let Tiger Woods deal with his problem, encourage him to seek the enlightenment he needs and, in the case of those who believe in a Supreme Being, pray for him and his family.

The great religions of the world all teach of our need to separate ourselves from the pressures of the world and, to some extent, subjugate ourselves to assure that our base natures do not rule.

Jesus taught that those who lose themselves in the service of others, will find true joy and, on the other hand, those who allow their physical urges to dictate their actions, will find incongruence and, ultimately, unhappiness.

Many men are in a constant personal battle with desires that are not in accordance with appropriate social interaction, and certainly not consistent with scripture or the teachings of their particular faith community. That battle must be won if society is to maintain its balance.

Tom Thorkelson

Director of Interfaith Relations

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints

Our relationship with God, like any good relationship, requires work. Spiritual work requires humility, passion and dedication.

But we do not have to go it alone. Others have traveled before us. They have left us maps and guides and helpful hints. We call these paths to God “spiritual disciplines” because if we follow them as a discipline, we will grow closer to God.

Ironically, if Tiger Woods had worked on his spiritual life, or even his relationship with his wife, with the same passion, dedication, and discipline as his golf game, he would most likely not be in his current mess.

We all sometimes act in self-destructive ways and act in our own worse interest. We have even become good at apologizing for the incident and misdeeds without ever changing our internal soul scape.

No one is self disciplined enough to make it by themselves to God. The Christian viewpoint is that God reaches out to us with forgiveness even before we can reach out to God. God offers us forgiveness without conditions so that we have the power to change our internal lifestyle. Spiritual disciplines become our response to receiving God’s love instead of a way to earn or achieve God’s love.

Pastor Mark Wiley

Mesa Verde United Methodist Church

“Self-discipline with awareness of consequences” is essential for every human being! Each of us must realize that we are finite and limited and that what we do affects others for better or worse. Those of us aware of our relationship with the Infinite-and-Unlimited One should live in ways that others might come to understand that “God is God and we are not,” as C.S. Lewis said. In Lent, Episcopalians relearn the Ten Commandments during worship, praying after each “Lord, have mercy upon us, and incline our hearts to keep this law,” or simply “Amen. Lord have mercy.” God’s mercy, grace and forgiveness abound much more than even our failures and sin.

Tiger Woods once said famously, “I think the guys who are really controlling their emotions ... are going to win.” An adaptation of Buddha’s wisdom is the best way to say that I agree with Tiger and the Dalai Lama: “It is better to conquer yourself than to win a thousand golf tournaments or have millions of dollars. Then the victory is yours. It cannot be taken from you, not by demons or angels, hell or heaven.”

(The Very Rev’d Canon) Peter D. Haynes

Saint Michael & All Angels Episcopal Church, Corona del Mar

Yes I do. As an atheist I am confronted daily with mostly small and occasionally large issues that involve discipline and restraint.

However, the phrase “outside ourselves” can mean many things. Since I do not believe in any supernatural forces or “outside forces,” this phrase has no meaning to me. Maybe it should be rephrased as “craving for things inside ourselves,” as Tiger’s behavior is clearly caused by his desires.

Why blame his behavior on others? Tiger made his decisions by himself. There was no other “power” involved. Discipline and restraint are a part of the learning curve as we age. How we spend our money and especially time (effort) is a clear indication of how each person balances discipline with pleasure and recreation. A balance of discipline allows one to be efficient at work while allowing the mind to enjoy the world around us.

Bruce Gleason

Backyard Skeptics