Carnett: These class acts are the only celebrities I care about

I don’t give a moldy fig for celebrities.

Truly.

And don’t expect me to know the names of any of today’s denizens of the red carpet — held in highest esteem by our vacuous Culture of Celebrity. These ninnies influence my life not one whit. “Vanity of vanities,” Solomon wrote three millennia ago. He was right … nothing new under the sun.

The acres of bare flesh displayed from magazine racks at supermarket checkout counters is scandalous. Sure, I’ve got normal hormonal responses to such images, but I refuse to be lured into a peep show. I choose, instead, to take a deep breath and examine the candy bars displayed just below the rack’s pulpy pulchritude. Haven’t had a PayDay in a while, hmmm.

What a gaggle of narcissistic clowns.

My daughter will say to me: “Dad, did you see what Katy Perry wore to the Oscars?”

“Who’s Katy Perry?” is my indifferent rejoinder. “Did Sinatra win for ‘Von Ryan’s Express’? I love that movie!”

I haven’t always been such a cynic when it comes to celebs.

While a college student in the late 1960s and early ‘70s, I worked as a sales clerk at Sears, South Coast Plaza. My workstation was the jewelry counter.

Actor John Wayne frequented the store. I’ve since learned, after reading Scott Eyman’s excellent biography, “John Wayne: The Life and Legend,” that Duke loved shopping at Sears.

Whenever he showed up, a Sears supervisor would dash about the store warning salespeople in a hoarse stage whisper, “John Wayne is here! John Wayne is here!”

Ten-hut!

Wayne never purchased a diamond from me, but he would occasionally walk through the department and glance in the glass cases.

“Good evening, Mr. Wayne,” I’d intone. He’d nod and smile. What a gentleman. I was always tempted to say, “Loved ‘Rio Bravo,’ sir!” But I never did.

While I was an undergrad at Cal State Fullerton, a couple of wonderful old stage, screen and TV character actors, Roscoe Lee Browne and Anthony Zerbe, regularly visited campus to conduct dramatic readings.

One or both came almost every semester I was there. They had a passion for their craft. I remember Zerbe would always take a few minutes to read works by the extraordinarily clever American poet E.E. Cummings. Cummings specialized in wordplay and colorful characters, and Zerbe infused the poems with life.

After each performance, Zerbe would stick around to chat with students. What a class act.

The Emmy-winning actor has forged a long and successful career. He’s had memorable parts in such fine films as “Cool Hand Luke,” “Papillon” and “They Call Me Mr. Tibbs!” Still performing at 78, he’s not as old today as I thought he was when I first encountered him in 1969. He was 33 then, but from the perspective of a humble student, I viewed him as an ancient.

Browne was 44 and to me a sage. He died in 2007 at the age of 81.

Blessed with a rich and sonorous voice, Browne was a fixture on the American stage. I remember once at Fullerton, he and Zerbe decided on impulse to read a passage from “Othello.” It was a magnificent moment. Browne was the graceful and erudite Moor and Zerbe the deliciously malevolent Iago.

Browne was a regular on such 1970s sitcoms as “All in the Family,” “Maude,” “Sanford and Son,” “Good Times” and “Barney Miller.” He won an Emmy for a guest appearance on “The Cosby Show.” His stage work was impeccable.

Zerbe still conducts readings on college campuses. He calls his performances “just one guy sharing poetry with some people.” He teaches two months out of the year at the Stella Adler Studio of Acting in New York City.

I’ve never forgotten Browne and Zerbe. Far from being narcissistic, they loved sharing their passion for literature. And I became a fan.

Their performances were never self-serving. They were on a mission to open student minds and imaginations.

Zerbe and Browne were celebrities that this (now!) cynical old coot could admire.

JIM CARNETT, who lives in Costa Mesa, worked for Orange Coast College for 37 years.