Commentary: Technology is stunting our interpersonal communication

I am a people-watcher, an observer. And I’ve been seeing things that worry me. A lot has been written about the pros and cons of technology, certainly more about pluses than the minuses.

But I must refer to a recent family event to serve as an example of my concern.

A few weeks ago, my Maryland family of five came to sunny California for a visit. These are sociable, intelligent people who know how to have a stimulating conversation.

We were sharing stories and enjoying each other’s company for about half an hour. Then, I noticed their eyes begin to stray to their iphones and iPads, which were never far from reach.

I knew not to take it personally, as the lure of instant communication is too much competition for a mere mortal. A year ago, I would have been red with rage, but since then even I have succumbed to this technology.

The next morning, we went to the local Starbucks for our morning joe. Although every seat was filled, the silence was deafening, as people typed on their ipads with a half cup of cold coffee in front of them. Only the barrister’s voice could be heard calling out names.

We then took the kids to Fashion Island. I watched as people strolled down the walkways, their eyes fixated on their phones, barely walking a straight line. Even in the stores, salespeople stole glances at their messages. Is this the new professional?

My grandson, 14 years old, educated me on the “new play date.” No longer is it necessary for kids to be together in order to hang out. Simply coordinate a time to play a computer game, while sitting in the comfort of your own home.

He went on to explain how much easier it is, rather than taking the time to arrange rides from parents. Could it possibly be the same experience? Am I missing something here?

Yesterday, I got to see this in action, as I watched him play “World of Warcraft” online with two other friends. His concentration was intense.

“If only he had the same attentiveness in school,” I thought.

My mother probably said the same thing about me 50 years ago, as I walked around with my transistor radio practically glued to my head.

Most of the people who I’ve been observing are younger than me. I wonder what their lives are like behind closed doors. Do they feel controlled by technology? How reliant are they on social media? Do they ever miss more face-to-face social interaction? Is their lifestyle becoming too sedentary?

I fear for the future of mankind. Will we become little robots awaiting instructions and information from our phones? Will we learn to problem-solve, without expecting instant answers? Will we ever need to practice patience again or has this become a dying art?

My grandson didn’t think I should write this commentary.

“You’ll sound like an old lady,” he said.

“But I am,” I replied. “One who cares about you enough to worry about your future.”

Although technology captivates us, is it also holding us captive?

TERRI GOLDSTEIN lives on Newport Coast.